Before I was mommy, I had a job. You know, like a real job.. not this I-sit-on-the-couch-all-day-eating-bon-bons-because-being-a-mommy-to-two-little-people-is-super-simple funny business. I worked in an office. I sat at a desk. I wore responsible, working, grown-up clothes. I had a commute. Blah blah. So five years ago. Literally.
I still have a lot of those clothes sitting in the back of my closet, because I have no reason to wear them anymore. I thought I was going to go back to work after Lily was born, but then I didn't. And didn't. And then there was Noah. And now I'm still not.
Most of the things are five to ten years old. But, if I do go back to working in an office will I want to be wearing clothes that are 5, 10, 15 or more years old? Or will I want nice, new clothes? With new, happy vibes and not old miserable vibes from a job I hated.
I have a hard time letting go of clothes that fit- because they've already been paid for, I have them, I could wear them. And in some ways it does make sense to just hold on to them rather than having to rebuy something similar. But who knows what kinds of things I will want to be wearing if or when that time comes. Maybe the kinds of clothes I already have- or maybe not.
Then there is the desire/goal that all those clothes will someday be just a little bit too big for me. And that is what is motivating me, more than anything else, to let this stuff go.
Friday, May 31, 2013
Thursday, May 30, 2013
Other mothers
Scene: Rain.
I drove Lily to school, but stopped before the last turn to wait for another school's bus. I saw it as we came up the street and it still sat there as we pulled up to the intersection and stopped. A few kids were running to catch it and cars were backed up in both directions in front of us.
Then, I heard yelling. Over the rain, in my car, with the radio on and windows rolled up. Over the roar of the bus and the engines of the cars on the cross street. I knew there were kids along the street and I looked around quickly to see if something had happen.
I didn't see anything in the street, but to my immediate left, I noticed two cars in the parking lot less than 15 feet away. A little girl, about 6 or 7, was getting out of the back seat of the car closest to us, while the woman in the front (her mother?) was yelling at her. SCREAMING. "Get out of the car!" "Get on the bus!" "GO! GOOO!" The girl, only half out of the car, hesitated and hesitated, looking back and forth from the bus. Finally she got out, started towards the bus, then whipped around toward the front of the car- like she was afraid to cross the street alone. By this time, her mother had gotten out of the front to attend to something in the back. The girl saw her, stopped, and headed toward the back of the car instead. Her mother grabbed her, started SCREAMING again, spun her around, and dragged her around the front of the car. Still screaming and making wild gestures, she shoved her daughter, hard, toward the bus.
With a lump in my throat, I felt my eyes starting to water and I turned my head- I hated that mother. I wanted to get out of my car and hug the girl.
Don't look Lily.
Why?
That mommy is screaming at her little girl. I don't want you to get upset.
I'm not.
That doesn't make your heart hurt? My heart hurts seeing that.
Why?
I don't know.. it's hard to explain. Would you want someone screaming at you like that?
No. But my heart had its dinosaur suit on.
Oh! So that protects it?
Yeah!
That's a good idea, I should do that too.
The bus driver must have been watching, because I don't know why else she would have sat there that long- she was waiting for her last passenger. I really hope she gave that girl a huge smile and hello when she finally made it on the bus.. her heart must have hurt so bad..
I drove Lily to school, but stopped before the last turn to wait for another school's bus. I saw it as we came up the street and it still sat there as we pulled up to the intersection and stopped. A few kids were running to catch it and cars were backed up in both directions in front of us.
Then, I heard yelling. Over the rain, in my car, with the radio on and windows rolled up. Over the roar of the bus and the engines of the cars on the cross street. I knew there were kids along the street and I looked around quickly to see if something had happen.
I didn't see anything in the street, but to my immediate left, I noticed two cars in the parking lot less than 15 feet away. A little girl, about 6 or 7, was getting out of the back seat of the car closest to us, while the woman in the front (her mother?) was yelling at her. SCREAMING. "Get out of the car!" "Get on the bus!" "GO! GOOO!" The girl, only half out of the car, hesitated and hesitated, looking back and forth from the bus. Finally she got out, started towards the bus, then whipped around toward the front of the car- like she was afraid to cross the street alone. By this time, her mother had gotten out of the front to attend to something in the back. The girl saw her, stopped, and headed toward the back of the car instead. Her mother grabbed her, started SCREAMING again, spun her around, and dragged her around the front of the car. Still screaming and making wild gestures, she shoved her daughter, hard, toward the bus.
With a lump in my throat, I felt my eyes starting to water and I turned my head- I hated that mother. I wanted to get out of my car and hug the girl.
Don't look Lily.
Why?
That mommy is screaming at her little girl. I don't want you to get upset.
I'm not.
That doesn't make your heart hurt? My heart hurts seeing that.
Why?
I don't know.. it's hard to explain. Would you want someone screaming at you like that?
No. But my heart had its dinosaur suit on.
Oh! So that protects it?
Yeah!
That's a good idea, I should do that too.
The bus driver must have been watching, because I don't know why else she would have sat there that long- she was waiting for her last passenger. I really hope she gave that girl a huge smile and hello when she finally made it on the bus.. her heart must have hurt so bad..
Wednesday, May 29, 2013
Our days of May
I finally uploaded the pictures from my camera and phone. There were only a couple hundred or so.. not a big deal. Or kind of a big deal; and kind of time consuming. And that was just from the last few months. But it's done now (just have to back them up on a third device, because I'm paranoid).
I've been trying to get out more with Lily and Noah. Now that we have a new stroller and the weather is getting nicer, it's actually happening. Unfortunately, Noah often likes pushing the stroller more than riding in it. That is until he gets in the stroller and falls asleep- which is just a matter of minutes.
The weather in this part of the world was so perfect for Memorial Day this year. Like, unrealistically perfect. And yes, the sky really was that blue.. it's not a filter.
My plants are doing okay. Some of them are doing really well and others.. well, I've lost a few along the way- mostly the sunflowers. I think they just weren't getting enough sun (my thumbs aren't as green as I wish they were). It's staying above 40 overnight now, so after all the rain we're supposed to get over the next few days.. I think a lot of them will be ready for permanent outdoor residence. Exciting..
Yesterday, the neighbors were setting their house on fire. Or something similar. Not only was smoke shooting straight up for close to an hour, but flames as well. Not flames like burning yard waste, but flames like a flamethrower. Or if you poured lighter fluid on a grill.. and lit it. And repeated. Over and over.
A few years ago, the exterior of this house was totally redone- the exterior walls, steps, porch, walkway and driveway, all of the landscaping. They always have some beautiful thing blooming in their front yard now.. aaand they have a giant garden too. So jealous- if only my thumbs were that green.
Then, on the other hand.. there's this building. Which leans and leans and leans. Every winter, every hurricane, every everything.. it falls apart a little more. Over the years, the roof caved in, the walls buckled, the roof detached completely. There's probably a few buildings like this in every town, but this is nothing, you should see the other side of this thing.
15 months old now, this one. And he runs (RUNS!) all over the place- including the driveway, which after his fall a few weeks ago, terrifies the heck outta me. At least he puts his hands out in front of him now. At least that.
I've been trying to get out more with Lily and Noah. Now that we have a new stroller and the weather is getting nicer, it's actually happening. Unfortunately, Noah often likes pushing the stroller more than riding in it. That is until he gets in the stroller and falls asleep- which is just a matter of minutes.
The weather in this part of the world was so perfect for Memorial Day this year. Like, unrealistically perfect. And yes, the sky really was that blue.. it's not a filter.
My plants are doing okay. Some of them are doing really well and others.. well, I've lost a few along the way- mostly the sunflowers. I think they just weren't getting enough sun (my thumbs aren't as green as I wish they were). It's staying above 40 overnight now, so after all the rain we're supposed to get over the next few days.. I think a lot of them will be ready for permanent outdoor residence. Exciting..
Yesterday, the neighbors were setting their house on fire. Or something similar. Not only was smoke shooting straight up for close to an hour, but flames as well. Not flames like burning yard waste, but flames like a flamethrower. Or if you poured lighter fluid on a grill.. and lit it. And repeated. Over and over.
A few years ago, the exterior of this house was totally redone- the exterior walls, steps, porch, walkway and driveway, all of the landscaping. They always have some beautiful thing blooming in their front yard now.. aaand they have a giant garden too. So jealous- if only my thumbs were that green.
15 months old now, this one. And he runs (RUNS!) all over the place- including the driveway, which after his fall a few weeks ago, terrifies the heck outta me. At least he puts his hands out in front of him now. At least that.
I can't remember what this plant is from last year.. I want to say it's hydrangea. Blue hydrangea. And it's definitely gotten bigger since last summer- I can't wait to see what it's going to look like. I feel like any day now I'll be out in the driveway and BAM giant blue blooms out of nowhere. I love that about spring.
Tuesday, May 28, 2013
inspired #6
to MAKE..
I wish my favorite falafel establishment was not 45 minutes away- I could easily eat there once a week. I need to be more brave and try making my own again..
to MAKE..
Love these bracelets- really simple, but fancy looking. Excuse me while I go looking for my craft store coupons..
to MAKE..
Do you believe that, as a child, I never had shrinky dinks? It's true- I don't know why, I just never did. So, this is particularly interesting to me (because as an adult, I STILL haven't tried them). This tutorial is a nice idea for Father's Day or any other occasion. Shrinky Dink tie tacks, key chains, etc.. of your children, pets, favorite hobbies, whatever.. Another thing on my list of things to do.
a LIKE..
Wow- if only my bathroom looked like this. Or half that good. I hate my bathroom.. and I love the floor in this one. A design like this would be totally lost on the bathroom I have now, but.. maybe someday.. in some bathroom..
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| homemade falafel and cucumber dressing @a beautiful mess |
to MAKE..
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| fancy friendship bracelets @a beautiful mess |
to MAKE..
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| shrinky dink father's day gifts @oh happy day |
a LIKE..
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| mosaic bathroom floor tile @bathroom-designs-ideas.com |
Monday, May 27, 2013
Chicken again
Another conversation that Lily and I had about chicken last week ..
What do you want to eat for lunch?
(ignoring me. playing a video game.)
(standing in front of her, blocking her view to the tv.) Lily, what do you want for lunch?
(leaning to the side to see around me.)
(moving back and forth to keep blocking her view as she moves to see around me)
Mom-my! I can't see..
I know. You can either answer me or I can keep blocking your view. Do you want chicken?
No.
What do you want then?
It's your choice.
It is, huh? Well, I'm making you chicken then.
Okay, I'll have chicken..
What do you want to eat for lunch?
(ignoring me. playing a video game.)
(standing in front of her, blocking her view to the tv.) Lily, what do you want for lunch?
(leaning to the side to see around me.)
(moving back and forth to keep blocking her view as she moves to see around me)
Mom-my! I can't see..
I know. You can either answer me or I can keep blocking your view. Do you want chicken?
No.
What do you want then?
It's your choice.
It is, huh? Well, I'm making you chicken then.
Okay, I'll have chicken..
Wednesday, May 22, 2013
Dinner conversation
Dinner tonight. Me and Lily.. it was something like this:
Can I have spaghetti?
Well, I already made you chicken..
But I'm holding the spaghetti.
I know, but can you please just eat the chicken?
No.
Lily, I'm really tired. Just eat the chicken, okay?
I want both.
No.
Yes!
Let me tell you something.. do you know how many hours of sleep an adult is supposed to get at night?
No.
Do you want me to tell you?
No.
8. And do you know how many I get?
No.
4 or 5.
Five!
No, I mean I get between 4 and 5 hours of sleep. Do you know what the difference between those numbers is?
No.
3 or 4.
Four!
No, I mean the difference is between 3 and 4 hours. And that adds up day after day after week after week..
I don't want to know about it.
It's a lot.
I told you I didn't want to know about it.
Well, I already told you, you can't unknow it now.
I'm taking it out of my head! And putting it in yours!
Ya.. I already know all about it..
Can I have spaghetti?
Well, I already made you chicken..
But I'm holding the spaghetti.
I know, but can you please just eat the chicken?
No.
Lily, I'm really tired. Just eat the chicken, okay?
I want both.
No.
Yes!
Let me tell you something.. do you know how many hours of sleep an adult is supposed to get at night?
No.
Do you want me to tell you?
No.
8. And do you know how many I get?
No.
4 or 5.
Five!
No, I mean I get between 4 and 5 hours of sleep. Do you know what the difference between those numbers is?
No.
3 or 4.
Four!
No, I mean the difference is between 3 and 4 hours. And that adds up day after day after week after week..
I don't want to know about it.
It's a lot.
I told you I didn't want to know about it.
Well, I already told you, you can't unknow it now.
I'm taking it out of my head! And putting it in yours!
Ya.. I already know all about it..
Sunday, May 19, 2013
I love her..
A pair of new shoes came for Lily in the mail last week. They were the
same shoes I had bought her a few weeks earlier, but had
returned because they were too big. The store didn't have her size, so
I just ordered them online instead.
I insisted she try them on so I would know if they were hurting her feet, felt okay, she liked them still, etc. She yelled "let me see how they are for running," ran down the hall with them on, and then announced "yup, they're good for running." At the end of the hall she said "let me see how they are for tap dancing," did a little dance, and then confirmed "yup, they're good for tap dancing!"
I love her..
I insisted she try them on so I would know if they were hurting her feet, felt okay, she liked them still, etc. She yelled "let me see how they are for running," ran down the hall with them on, and then announced "yup, they're good for running." At the end of the hall she said "let me see how they are for tap dancing," did a little dance, and then confirmed "yup, they're good for tap dancing!"
I love her..
Saturday, May 18, 2013
what we did the last few weeks
2. Lily and I had our first Mommy and Lily date- getting ice cream. She had wanted to walk to get the ice cream, but I don't think she realized how much walking to get ice cream actually entailed. But we made it anyway. Guess who had to carry her backpack, sweatshirt, and practically her on the way back?
3. Mother's Day. There was chocolate. And cards. And my children. It doesn't get much better than that.
4. I saw this sign while Jason was getting take-out. He couldn't understand why I was taking a picture of it, but.. seriously? It's sad when there has to be signage to remind us of common sense.
5-7. Lily's self portrait, her depiction of Jason, and me. Not sure why I have SO many fingers, but I guess that's part of being a mommy. Either that or I took all Jason's, as I've just realized he has none.
8. Our shoes. Says a lot about us I think.
9. It took me years to get to Chipotle. Even when they opened one in the next town over and I had the opening day in my calendar.. with reminders.. it still took me over a year to go. And I was SO missing out. Completely delicious. And the backs of their receipts are.. love.
Wednesday, May 15, 2013
Siblings
I watched my children playing together today and all I could really think was.. yes, this. At 15 months, Noah is more able to play with his big sister than ever before. Of course he still "messes up" her elaborate set-ups with small animals and houses and dinning tables and beds and food and whatever else, but.. he's a toddler. She yells "noAH!" at him, but I tell her "he didn't do it on purpose, he just wants to play with you" and she usually calms down. Ah, siblings. How amazing must it be to have a live-in playmate..
I do have a half-sister, but I haven't seen her since I was 7, so I don't know how much of a bond we ever had. Whatever it was then, I hardly remember now. Sad. But my goodness do my children ever look like they have fun together- even at these early ages.
Noah walked before his first birthday; I really believe it was so he could better keep up with his sister. He runs around the house now, chasing her, screaming with delight. Actually, they both scream like that. And he ate his birthday cake with a fork. Probably because Lily did.
They each have their own toys- sort of. But it's really more like we just have a ridiculous amount of things to play with because they both play with everything. Everything- whether it's dinosaurs or dolls. The dinosaurs were originally Lily's, but Noah really took a liking to them. There are baby and toddler toys that were bought for Noah, but Lily often plays with them more.
Of course, being three years older, Lily occasionally gets a little rougher with Noah than she should, but I can't imagine the two of them could love each other any more than they already do. Aand.. most of the time he doesn't seem to mind too much when she acts like a four year-old. Except when she snatches something away from him.. then those baby tears of his come out in full force.
I just hope that there isn't ever jealousy between them. Having little experience in a sibling relationship, I think I way over compensate for every possible thing with Lily and Noah. I work so hard to acknowledge everything that they both do. Each milestone that Noah reaches, I make sure I say that yes, Lily can do that too. It probably makes me sound crazy to get excited that my four year-old is walking (too), but I think she likes it. And wouldn't you? Hey, look at you.. walking from one side of the room to the other! Good job, you! Woah, using a fork?! Awesome..
I do have a half-sister, but I haven't seen her since I was 7, so I don't know how much of a bond we ever had. Whatever it was then, I hardly remember now. Sad. But my goodness do my children ever look like they have fun together- even at these early ages.
Noah walked before his first birthday; I really believe it was so he could better keep up with his sister. He runs around the house now, chasing her, screaming with delight. Actually, they both scream like that. And he ate his birthday cake with a fork. Probably because Lily did.
They each have their own toys- sort of. But it's really more like we just have a ridiculous amount of things to play with because they both play with everything. Everything- whether it's dinosaurs or dolls. The dinosaurs were originally Lily's, but Noah really took a liking to them. There are baby and toddler toys that were bought for Noah, but Lily often plays with them more.
Of course, being three years older, Lily occasionally gets a little rougher with Noah than she should, but I can't imagine the two of them could love each other any more than they already do. Aand.. most of the time he doesn't seem to mind too much when she acts like a four year-old. Except when she snatches something away from him.. then those baby tears of his come out in full force.
I just hope that there isn't ever jealousy between them. Having little experience in a sibling relationship, I think I way over compensate for every possible thing with Lily and Noah. I work so hard to acknowledge everything that they both do. Each milestone that Noah reaches, I make sure I say that yes, Lily can do that too. It probably makes me sound crazy to get excited that my four year-old is walking (too), but I think she likes it. And wouldn't you? Hey, look at you.. walking from one side of the room to the other! Good job, you! Woah, using a fork?! Awesome..
Sunday, May 12, 2013
Lily's mom
The story that Lily is telling about the picture, now, is not the same one I got when I originally asked. The original story was about a green alien that was sad because he missed his mommy. The thing on the left was a tower. The story I'm getting now started out about a sad kid with a mean mommy (and that was a ladder), but then changed to it not being a "mommy picture" at all. So, who knows.. don't feel bad parents, our kids have no idea what they drew either.
It says: My mom is 15 years old. My mom is the prettiest when she takes me for a walk outside. My mom likes to make cake. My mom always says I love you. My mom is funny when she does silly stuff.
Lily thinks I'm 15- and I will take that! But other than that, she really knows me. At first the "my mom likes to make cake" thing confused me, but when she finished the sentence with "for my birthday," I realized it was true. That is actually the only time I ever make cake.. for Lily and Noah's birthdays. It's interesting that that is what she chose as what I "like to make."
I wonder what her answers were that didn't make it onto the paper. I'd have loved to have been a fly on the wall for that..
Friday, May 10, 2013
Taking care of just one
Earlier this week, I had one of my most heartbreaking parenting moments to date. Lily suddenly stopped what she was doing, looked up at me, and said "remember when you used to take care of just me?"
Sharp inhale. Mouth open. Mouth shut. "Yes, I remember that," I told her. "But.. isn't it more fun now with Noah?" I don't remember what she said, I think she might not have said anything, but just wandered back away to do her own thing.
The next day, before Noah woke up I talked to Lily about what she'd asked me. In the middle of it, I got so choked up there were a few tears I couldn't stop. Twenty-three and a half hours a day, I spend so much time taking care of the both of them and the house and the bills and myself.. trying to balance.. trying to be even.. and fair.. making sure that they aren't jealous of each other, etc.. that I just forgot..
For three and a half years, it was me and Lily. Just me and Lily, so so so much of the time. And then suddenly there was Noah too. She loves him.. and he loves her.. there's no denying that. But.. I just forgot that Lily and I don't get time with just the two of us anymore. Aside from taking her to school a few times without Noah, the last time she and I were just the two of us was about 6 months ago.. when I took her to get her hearing tested.
Oh mommy, how did you just fail so hard here?
All I could do was something new, starting now. So the mommy and Lily date was born. She was so excited. SO excited to have the date with me, just me. And I was excited too. The first one was today- we got ice cream and went for a walk. Then we went shopping for Lily- mainly for new sandals, but somehow we found other things she needed, including orange fuzzy headphone earmuffs (because, why not?).
In all the days, weeks, and months that I spent trying to figure out how to take care of two, I forgot that sometimes I just need to take care of one for a little while.
Sharp inhale. Mouth open. Mouth shut. "Yes, I remember that," I told her. "But.. isn't it more fun now with Noah?" I don't remember what she said, I think she might not have said anything, but just wandered back away to do her own thing.
The next day, before Noah woke up I talked to Lily about what she'd asked me. In the middle of it, I got so choked up there were a few tears I couldn't stop. Twenty-three and a half hours a day, I spend so much time taking care of the both of them and the house and the bills and myself.. trying to balance.. trying to be even.. and fair.. making sure that they aren't jealous of each other, etc.. that I just forgot..
For three and a half years, it was me and Lily. Just me and Lily, so so so much of the time. And then suddenly there was Noah too. She loves him.. and he loves her.. there's no denying that. But.. I just forgot that Lily and I don't get time with just the two of us anymore. Aside from taking her to school a few times without Noah, the last time she and I were just the two of us was about 6 months ago.. when I took her to get her hearing tested.
Oh mommy, how did you just fail so hard here?
All I could do was something new, starting now. So the mommy and Lily date was born. She was so excited. SO excited to have the date with me, just me. And I was excited too. The first one was today- we got ice cream and went for a walk. Then we went shopping for Lily- mainly for new sandals, but somehow we found other things she needed, including orange fuzzy headphone earmuffs (because, why not?).
In all the days, weeks, and months that I spent trying to figure out how to take care of two, I forgot that sometimes I just need to take care of one for a little while.
Monday, May 6, 2013
Our totally boring and uneventual day
Oh, where do I begin? (Ya.. this is gonna be a good one..)
This morning actually went fairly smoothly. Yes, I only got 5 or 6 hours of sleep and I was rather tired, BUT I had slept on the fluffy cloud couch and my back wasn't hurting when I woke up. There was breakfast, getting dressed, getting Lily ready for school, getting Noah up, etc etc.. it all went fine. A little finer than it usually does.. we were only about 10 minutes late getting Lily to school. Which, for us, is like being early for most people.
After Noah and I dropped Lily off at school, I really didn't have a plan. Maybe get new tires. Maybe. (Did I mention my car almost didn't pass inspection last Monday because of my tires? I think the dealer just felt bad for me.) I didn't know.. I didn't really want to with Noah. I didn't know how long it was going to take. The new stroller hadn't come yet, so either we'd have to wait there or I'd have to carry him wherever we did go. Moan moan moan.
So, we went. There were no cars in front of the store and no other customers waiting. The clerk was super helpful, even laughing along with me about some of the tires he showed me when he mentioned they were made by a top company in Japan (?) known for their racing tires. Ya, racing tires, that's totally what I need on my 10 year old car that I drive my little kids around in.
I chose my tires and asked how long it would take. About an hour, he told me, maybe less. Oh. Wow. Okay. And off Noah and I walked to get breakfast.
Noah was great, eating half the egg out of my sandwich, drinking all his milk, and sitting quietly in the highchair until he was ready to leave. Then he was totally all set with the entire thing- and we were off again.
We walked back the same way we had come and stopped by a little park. Really little. Tiny parking lot, small grassy area, and a little pond/swamp behind that. But there were a few benches. And bird feeders made by Girl Scouts. I'd driven by it hundreds and hundreds of times (thousands?).. but never stopped in. I wish I had. The first thing I found once we stepped onto the grass was a four-leaf clover. Hadn't seen one in years, and bam- there one was. What luck.
We saw one goose, several male ducks, and one female duck with 4 or 5 babies swimming along behind her. There were tons of birds, including what I think was a red winged black bird (according to the internet). I so wish I had my good camera and not just my iPhone (while holding a toddler).
Noah wasn't super excited about any of it, but he tolerated it alright. We stayed for about 20 minutes and then finished walking back, hoping the tires would be done.
They weren't, but Noah had a lovely time wandering around the maze of tires until the car was done. Also, the tires I had originally picked out had already been sold and I was upgraded to the another set of tires for the same price. Win.
I drove home, while Noah slept. And he stayed asleep while I carried him into the house. So.. I got to take a shower before we had to go pick up Lily from school! (Shhhh! I know!)
After I was clean, I brought the recycling outside.. just as the FedEx truck was pulling up with my newly purchased stroller. Very exciting stuff.
Then.. since Noah was still sleeping, I called the hospital to dispute charges from my most recent visit, fully dreading it and ready for "well, since you blah blah blah then that's what the charge for that is and blah blah blah." Then I'd have to call my insurance company, who won't talk to its customers directly. I'd have to explain everything in horribly agonizing detail to a third party that somehow never really seems to understand. And then stay on the line so they can then do a awful job re-explaining it to my insurance company before they leave me on my own with the insurance representative. Honestly, it is the most asinine waste of time/job.
Buut instead, when I very briefly paraphrased the situation to the hospital's billing department the woman just said "okay, I'll wave that for you then." And poof, my bill dropped by $150. As did my jaw.
When Noah and I got to Lily's school, she didn't really want to leave- telling me that she "decided to stay longer," but she ultimately came along quietly.
Then we got home (dun dun dun). Lily ran around outside for a few minutes, but I was tired from our morning and just wanted to go inside. She wanted to play with the ants- and ignore me. Noah had been toddling around the driveway, but had stalled out at one point. I picked him up, started to walk to the door, and called for Lily to follow us- several times. Not shockingly, she didn't. I put Noah down so I'd have both hands free to deal with Lily, taking her hand, picking her up, whatever was going to be needed.
But, I didn't get more than 4 or 5 feet when I heard Noah starting to cry and turned to see him on the ground. He'd fallen, face first, on the driveway- in the exact spot I had left him standing. I don't think he'd even put his arms out, just- bam, right on his face. Oh. Oh, the blood. I scooped him up and screamed at Lily. SCREAMED. To get over to me and get inside the house. NOW.
Did he knock his teeth out? I really didn't want to look, I really didn't. I didn't want to see more blood and a big gap where a lovely little baby tooth had once sat.
He started to calm down a little bit once I got him inside, but every time I touched his face he just screamed. With paper towel. With a face cloth. With a mini-ice pack. He wanted none of it. Not touching his face.. no reaction. Trying to see how many teeth he had knocked out or if his teeth were imbedded in his face.. hysterical screaming.
While he was laying on the floor, with his mouth open a little, I managed to see that one of the teeth was just a bubble of red liquid and I thought for sure it was hanging on by a thread. After a few minutes, when I tried to look again it looked like maybe his top teeth actually were imbedded in his lip. Shiiiit. (And how he wasn't screaming in agony about it, I have no idea.)
I tried to get Lily to hold one of his hands away from his face so I could try to pull his lip off his teeth. Which had been Jason's super helpful advice via telephone. Not the Lily part, the other part. That didn't work even a little bit- I needed at least two more hands. Of course I was the only adult home. Of course my mother-in-law, a nurse, wasn't home. Of course Jason wasn't at the local office. And of-freaking-course it was 12:40 and the pediatrician wasn't back from lunch until after 1:00.
So we just got in the car. Eventually. (The more emergent the situation, the slower Lily moves while getting ready. Thank goodness the house isn't on fire, I told her.) And while I called the doctor several times before we just showed up, they never answered.
But, it didn't really matter- they saw us anyway. I laid Noah across my lap, held both his arms with one hand (while keeping his legs down with that elbow), and held down/stroked his head with the other hand. The doctor, holding a flashlight in one hand, examined his mouth fully. Noah flailed and screamed hysterically entire time. Understandably so.
Thankfully, thankfully.. his teeth weren't broken. Or knocked out or even loose (so far). His mouth and upper lip were cut open in several places.. bloody and swollen. He got an Advil prescription for the next few days and I got the job of having to be constantly, hysterically panicked about checking his teeth to made sure they don't start to get darker. Which would indicate they are dead. And FYI, that's not a good thing.
And then we came home. And everyone eventually fell asleep, except me. Because I have to calm down and eat chocolate and drink coffee. Because.. this is just what our life is like some days.
(I wasn't sure if hurt or helped, but.. I've had like 6 and half hours to think about it now. And.. I think because Noah had a pacifier in his mouth when he hit the pavement.. that probably saved his teeth. Like.. a baby mouth guard. And here I was thinking we really needed to move on from those binkies.)
This morning actually went fairly smoothly. Yes, I only got 5 or 6 hours of sleep and I was rather tired, BUT I had slept on the fluffy cloud couch and my back wasn't hurting when I woke up. There was breakfast, getting dressed, getting Lily ready for school, getting Noah up, etc etc.. it all went fine. A little finer than it usually does.. we were only about 10 minutes late getting Lily to school. Which, for us, is like being early for most people.
After Noah and I dropped Lily off at school, I really didn't have a plan. Maybe get new tires. Maybe. (Did I mention my car almost didn't pass inspection last Monday because of my tires? I think the dealer just felt bad for me.) I didn't know.. I didn't really want to with Noah. I didn't know how long it was going to take. The new stroller hadn't come yet, so either we'd have to wait there or I'd have to carry him wherever we did go. Moan moan moan.
So, we went. There were no cars in front of the store and no other customers waiting. The clerk was super helpful, even laughing along with me about some of the tires he showed me when he mentioned they were made by a top company in Japan (?) known for their racing tires. Ya, racing tires, that's totally what I need on my 10 year old car that I drive my little kids around in.
I chose my tires and asked how long it would take. About an hour, he told me, maybe less. Oh. Wow. Okay. And off Noah and I walked to get breakfast.
Noah was great, eating half the egg out of my sandwich, drinking all his milk, and sitting quietly in the highchair until he was ready to leave. Then he was totally all set with the entire thing- and we were off again.
We walked back the same way we had come and stopped by a little park. Really little. Tiny parking lot, small grassy area, and a little pond/swamp behind that. But there were a few benches. And bird feeders made by Girl Scouts. I'd driven by it hundreds and hundreds of times (thousands?).. but never stopped in. I wish I had. The first thing I found once we stepped onto the grass was a four-leaf clover. Hadn't seen one in years, and bam- there one was. What luck.
We saw one goose, several male ducks, and one female duck with 4 or 5 babies swimming along behind her. There were tons of birds, including what I think was a red winged black bird (according to the internet). I so wish I had my good camera and not just my iPhone (while holding a toddler).
Noah wasn't super excited about any of it, but he tolerated it alright. We stayed for about 20 minutes and then finished walking back, hoping the tires would be done.
They weren't, but Noah had a lovely time wandering around the maze of tires until the car was done. Also, the tires I had originally picked out had already been sold and I was upgraded to the another set of tires for the same price. Win.
I drove home, while Noah slept. And he stayed asleep while I carried him into the house. So.. I got to take a shower before we had to go pick up Lily from school! (Shhhh! I know!)
After I was clean, I brought the recycling outside.. just as the FedEx truck was pulling up with my newly purchased stroller. Very exciting stuff.
Then.. since Noah was still sleeping, I called the hospital to dispute charges from my most recent visit, fully dreading it and ready for "well, since you blah blah blah then that's what the charge for that is and blah blah blah." Then I'd have to call my insurance company, who won't talk to its customers directly. I'd have to explain everything in horribly agonizing detail to a third party that somehow never really seems to understand. And then stay on the line so they can then do a awful job re-explaining it to my insurance company before they leave me on my own with the insurance representative. Honestly, it is the most asinine waste of time/job.
Buut instead, when I very briefly paraphrased the situation to the hospital's billing department the woman just said "okay, I'll wave that for you then." And poof, my bill dropped by $150. As did my jaw.
When Noah and I got to Lily's school, she didn't really want to leave- telling me that she "decided to stay longer," but she ultimately came along quietly.
Then we got home (dun dun dun). Lily ran around outside for a few minutes, but I was tired from our morning and just wanted to go inside. She wanted to play with the ants- and ignore me. Noah had been toddling around the driveway, but had stalled out at one point. I picked him up, started to walk to the door, and called for Lily to follow us- several times. Not shockingly, she didn't. I put Noah down so I'd have both hands free to deal with Lily, taking her hand, picking her up, whatever was going to be needed.
But, I didn't get more than 4 or 5 feet when I heard Noah starting to cry and turned to see him on the ground. He'd fallen, face first, on the driveway- in the exact spot I had left him standing. I don't think he'd even put his arms out, just- bam, right on his face. Oh. Oh, the blood. I scooped him up and screamed at Lily. SCREAMED. To get over to me and get inside the house. NOW.
Did he knock his teeth out? I really didn't want to look, I really didn't. I didn't want to see more blood and a big gap where a lovely little baby tooth had once sat.
He started to calm down a little bit once I got him inside, but every time I touched his face he just screamed. With paper towel. With a face cloth. With a mini-ice pack. He wanted none of it. Not touching his face.. no reaction. Trying to see how many teeth he had knocked out or if his teeth were imbedded in his face.. hysterical screaming.
While he was laying on the floor, with his mouth open a little, I managed to see that one of the teeth was just a bubble of red liquid and I thought for sure it was hanging on by a thread. After a few minutes, when I tried to look again it looked like maybe his top teeth actually were imbedded in his lip. Shiiiit. (And how he wasn't screaming in agony about it, I have no idea.)
I tried to get Lily to hold one of his hands away from his face so I could try to pull his lip off his teeth. Which had been Jason's super helpful advice via telephone. Not the Lily part, the other part. That didn't work even a little bit- I needed at least two more hands. Of course I was the only adult home. Of course my mother-in-law, a nurse, wasn't home. Of course Jason wasn't at the local office. And of-freaking-course it was 12:40 and the pediatrician wasn't back from lunch until after 1:00.
So we just got in the car. Eventually. (The more emergent the situation, the slower Lily moves while getting ready. Thank goodness the house isn't on fire, I told her.) And while I called the doctor several times before we just showed up, they never answered.
But, it didn't really matter- they saw us anyway. I laid Noah across my lap, held both his arms with one hand (while keeping his legs down with that elbow), and held down/stroked his head with the other hand. The doctor, holding a flashlight in one hand, examined his mouth fully. Noah flailed and screamed hysterically entire time. Understandably so.
Thankfully, thankfully.. his teeth weren't broken. Or knocked out or even loose (so far). His mouth and upper lip were cut open in several places.. bloody and swollen. He got an Advil prescription for the next few days and I got the job of having to be constantly, hysterically panicked about checking his teeth to made sure they don't start to get darker. Which would indicate they are dead. And FYI, that's not a good thing.
And then we came home. And everyone eventually fell asleep, except me. Because I have to calm down and eat chocolate and drink coffee. Because.. this is just what our life is like some days.
(I wasn't sure if hurt or helped, but.. I've had like 6 and half hours to think about it now. And.. I think because Noah had a pacifier in his mouth when he hit the pavement.. that probably saved his teeth. Like.. a baby mouth guard. And here I was thinking we really needed to move on from those binkies.)
Saturday, May 4, 2013
what we did this week
1. Broccoli of lunch. An entire bowl. Because.. why not.
2-3. The greens (and purples) of spring.
4. Ever wonder what happens when you leave a Goldfish cracker in water? No, me neither. But, when you discover it accidentally while doing dishes.. you take a picture of it and include it in the highlights of your fascinating week.
5. Saw a commercial with Gordon Ramsay and Team Umizoomi. Hysterical. I think I've seen it before, but had just forgotten about it. I love that he can poke fun at himself.
6. The best thing to see when you're expecting an exciting package to be delivered? "On vehicle for delivery." Now where is it already? We want to try it out!
Thursday, May 2, 2013
Preschool life
Lily, Noah, and I were recently watching an episode of Jake & the Never Land Pirates when Lily suddenly blurted out something about a girl at school with yellow hair. "(Something something) put paint on the table and she licks it off" is what it sounded like to me. What?! I obviously misheard her.
She puts paints on the table and licks it off?!
NO!
(Oh, okay- phew.)
SHE doesn't do it.
Other people put paint on the table?
Yeah.
And she licks it off?
Yeah.
(I didn't say anything for a second, just starred at her. And she starred back at me.) That's gross, Lily.
(Watching tv again.) Yeah.
I know my child is not a perfect angel 100% of the time she's at school, but I now have something else to add to my list of conversations-that-I-thankfully-do-not-have-to-have-with-Lily's-teachers.
The original item on that list, by the way, was the 'your child bit another child today' conversation. Which, I can only assume happened, because I was there for the actual incident. I was about 10 feet away from two boys on the playground.. one on a swing, the other standing nearby, but then turned to see what Lily was doing. About 5 seconds later, I whipped my head back around at the sound of wailing.. and tears. The one on the swing had, out of nowhere, bit the other one.. on the stomach.
Preschool is rough apparently.
She puts paints on the table and licks it off?!
NO!
(Oh, okay- phew.)
SHE doesn't do it.
Other people put paint on the table?
Yeah.
And she licks it off?
Yeah.
(I didn't say anything for a second, just starred at her. And she starred back at me.) That's gross, Lily.
(Watching tv again.) Yeah.
I know my child is not a perfect angel 100% of the time she's at school, but I now have something else to add to my list of conversations-that-I-thankfully-do-not-have-to-have-with-Lily's-teachers.
The original item on that list, by the way, was the 'your child bit another child today' conversation. Which, I can only assume happened, because I was there for the actual incident. I was about 10 feet away from two boys on the playground.. one on a swing, the other standing nearby, but then turned to see what Lily was doing. About 5 seconds later, I whipped my head back around at the sound of wailing.. and tears. The one on the swing had, out of nowhere, bit the other one.. on the stomach.
Preschool is rough apparently.
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